Leila: I can't remember what inspired you to make split pea soup, can you?
J: I remembered eating it at Anderson's Split Pea soup in Southern California when I was young and I've always liked it. I couldn't find any versions I liked in stores though so I decided to try to make my own.
L: How do you like your split pea soup?
J: Chunks of ham, chunky vegetables. I like it thick enough that you can scoop it with a piece of bread and it'll come up with chunks.
L: You like it super thick, almost like stew.
Following is what I consider to be the vaguest and most imprecise recipe on the planet so I've added some edits. It works though. It really works. The soup is great on a cold day and yields plenty of leftovers.
+ Soak the peas for as long as you're willing to let them sit on the counter (we usually soak a full 16 oz bag for about 5 hours).
+ When you're ready to start cooking (after the peas have finished soaking), pour some olive oil and a couple cloves of chopped garlic into a giant pot and turn it to medium heat. Let the garlic simmer while you chop up any available potatoes (2-3 Russets usually) into small cubes and throw those into the pot and stir. Let those cook since they need to cook the longest.
+ Grab some carrots (not the baby kind but the kind where you might get some dirt or a piece of stringy vegetable hair off of them) - the nice, big kind. You chop those into circles and toss them into the pot, stirring occasionally so nothing gets burnt. At this point you might want to add a gob of butter to the pot so that nothing sticks to the bottom.
+ Grab some celery and chop that up into half-inch slices, the chunkier the better. Stress that it should be chunky. (L: Yeah, I definitely got that in there.) Toss those in and continue stirring.
+ Now grab a whole yellow or white onion and chop off the ends. Cut that into reasonable sized chunks. At this point it's probably a good idea to start adding some spices to your mound of vegetables. Grab the heavy grain salt (sea salt) and put a healthy covering of it on. Grind some pepper for 10 or 15 seconds too. You might want to add Spike because Spike is amazing - about half a bottle....no I'm kidding. Give it about 10 shakes.
+ Now add some of the cubed ham. Chop it into small pieces because small chunks distribute better and you want those in every bite. Throw those into the pot. Right about now your house should be smelling like warm, buttery vegetables and people who walk in the room should be saying, "Mmmm that smells good."
+ Finally, grab your soaked split peas and pour the whole container of peas, including the water they've been soaking in, into the pot. Continue to fill your pot with water until it's 2/3 filled and stir it all up. Partially cover the pot with a lid. Bring the mixture to a boil and let it simmer until the water is cooked off and the soup thickens. Stir occasionally to make sure nothing sticks to the bottom of the pot. You probably need to turn the heat down at some point too. Turn the heat down to medium or medium-low somewhere in the 2 hours that it'll take to cook the soup. Serve with artisan sourdough bread.
